vivian_L

注定遇见的人再怎样回避也是徒劳；

该发生的还是发生了；

没有缘分，再怎样互相喜欢，互相关心都还是痛苦；

我会一直记着这四个月以来这样的男人对我的好；

在我最需要帮助的时候，他会在我身边；

这样那样的关心，这样那样的sweet；

以及从来没有遇到过的默契；

我为他认为我给他带来的和其他人完全不同的special感觉 和 初恋一样纯洁的感情 而感动欣慰；

这样好的男人， 可是算了；

依然感激可以预见；

希望像之前所说的那样以后依然可以对对方很真诚，彼此很欣赏，互助友爱。不说不做刻意伤害对方的话或事。这样就不会伤害很大，做不了爱人就做红/蓝颜知己吧。永远不要恨对方；

就这样吧。

 

 

 

1 Seen some famous people recently, Mr Zheng, Samaranch, Zhenliang He. wanna get power from those capable man.

2 Played Golf twice in one week.

3 Do I become a little snobbish?

I’m more likely to be angry nowadays for those trivial details, like, why I can’t understand all the information stated in the magazine I read when I take subway in the morning? Why I can't remember the words or some terms I recited yesterday? Why I can’t be more considerate for my each planning? Why I can’t increase my speed when reading a book? Why I don’t have the shape or some other out looking things I endeavor to have? Why I can’t be more clearly and perspicacious?

 

Angle and devil weave in and out in my mind showing discriminating opinions. Angle alarmed me by some traditional moral and devil utilizes my exposed curiosity to do evil things.

 

Sometimes I thinks I am still young and full of energy so I never fear failure or frustration, and it’s not time to settle down as I wanna struggle for、try、and have fun with more fancy or stimulated experience. I don’t know whether It's an error that when you discover you have some power and talent in doing sth or controlling sth you suddenly become more greedy as you desire for more. But as for the advantage part, you become more industrious and seemly you could better control yourself unsimilar to what you used to be.

 

I can’t be peaceful and in harmony unless I’ve already known where can my ability reach and really content with what I’m I doing.

     那个奇怪的我一直觉得是江湖骗子的3年前骚扰我到不行一个劲让我去学表演的让我害怕得都不敢一个人回家的"导演"在我都快忘记他时周么又打来了电话，讲他这三年怎么在上海，又怎么辗转到国外，讲他刚和XXX从汶川义演回来，还问我怎么样怎么样，私人的问题不私人的问题他都问还让我去看他北影学生排的话剧，我真是不知道这样的人都是怎么想的，没完没了。

    周么出去玩和琼美女一个房间，她真的太美了，好喜欢～我觉得女孩子还是白白的，乖巧的，低调的好。即使什么都懂了，也要内敛地。什么好像都懂一点，出去跟人贫，其实又不是真懂，跟大姐大似的，还老爱评价别人的女生，就会很让人很讨厌，我可不要变成这样的。

   最近玩得太多了，要收敛一下，我给自己每天定计划，在没有开始考试复习前，一定要做两件事，所有事都排在这两件事情后面！

Yestoday I went to Lama temple again to say my thanks and meanwhile to make an another wish. I was holding a complicatedly up-side-down sentiment when I suddently remembered the time about 4 months ago I made 3 wishes there. How happily I was then and all that was because of SB. But now time passed my first wish has completed and the second one seemed to be ruined.  

I readded his MSN the week before last week and spoke a word to him after 3 months. Again it was me to break the ice. I don't know. Except from heart beat, I think, it is more like the admiration I am holding towards the guy even though he must feel sorry to me because of his selfish, his cool and his evil curiosity! And even though I met someone more cliever and excellent than him. I still feel a little excited to see his MSN land on. 

I confessed that I'v really done something evil from April and I know its so baaad.... I should cut off the connection.

 

Chatting with an old friend on MSN, I got one truth even though other people have already revealed that before and I never confessed... It's about my personality.  I wanna be  low-pitched but oppositely I always want to be the focus subconsciously. I am a contradiction combination.

 

Today I went to the Xinjiang Restaurant again~~~ I like eye contact with the hot and sexy dancing girl.~~ Really nice body and act!!  

 

 

 

With some complicated nervous mood I stepped into this new place~ Hoho, And finanlly it proved that I'v made a correct choice. Actually nobody really got the meaning of my signment on MSN-The long war. Sb asked why I still hold the signment and it's time now to celebrate for the result. In fact the changing is not the end of my willing but only just a part of or to say, just a begining. I get my time back and finally I could do sth for myself now which is much more glamrous . BTW, I like all the things concerned to glamor & passion. I have a figure in my mind about myself in 30. I wanna be that kind of women. So come on~~

 

BTW, I met a person here and I must to say again. It's a small world ~~

 

Sometimes I don't content with such status

Stand by the cross road

I just wanna a wider space

I wanna fly

I wanna make bigger

This is destined an alterative year 

I just wanna run faster and grow stronger

Change it